As the fifty-fifth Mandarin fortune cookie yelped for mercy from my stomach, I couldn't help but be inspired by a scene from a movie including blonde-haired Bette Midler sharing a joint with botox-injected Meg Ryan. So here goes...
To all men out there, do whatever the hell is it that you want: attempting to own those "Situation" abs, taking that hot ass by the bar to your car, and... and that pretty much covers everything that goes through a man's head, except maybe switching the order of which they were written.
To the ladies, dido. Whether it's quitting your currently horrible job to take time off, dancing like a clucking chicken at a funeral, growing a fresh new tray of wheatgrass (haha, mine failed), and the list continues.
Who gives a shit what you think, your amigos, the fam, your boss, that cute rando you decided to flip the finger to for no apparent reason to be understood by man. It doesn't matter.
The key to life is being selfish. Give a whole lot to yourself, and if anyone should be lucky enough to be graced by your godliness, they'll feel the love. 'Cause I've come to realize, that sacrificing your talent, desires and life for others only stiffles (yes I wrote stiffles) your energy and leaves you angry, eventually leading to your ass on a street begging for a spare orange peel to suck the remaining citrus goodness out of. True story.
Be clear on what it is you want, do it, and don't care for the consequences or approval from anyone. No apologies.
Amen.
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