Two cans of camel-coloured odour free paint lie in my closet to go over the fuscia walls I've seen since '94. One acoustic guitar has stood in the corner of my room with one broken string for 7 months. One children's 7-book set has sat on my bookshelf leaving me with six-and-a-half still left to be read. Two lucky bamboo plants planted in a vase by my window turned yellow 4 months ago.
Ever been in that spot where there's something you have to do, and you should do, but you don't want to do it and you do want to do it at the same time? Ladies? Those last 5 pounds of cellulite hanging under your right ass cheek (and your left... make that 10 pounds) all gained before heading on a beautiful Carribean vacation? I guess the best thing I can say is... (enter Nike slogan here).
'Cause after all, do those two big plastic bins of school books in the trunk that were to be taken to Goodwill 3 months ago, do they really weigh down the Corolla when driving under dangerously icy conditions? Cut the crap. The man that invented the phrase "safety first"... well, he lied to you. Just do it! Except if you're expecting an unexpected pregnancy, then boys and girls, 'Protect Ya Tings!'
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